Natural Deodorant Failure

I'm not a stinky guy. I'm not prone to heavy sweat or body odor. In fact, most people tell me I smell pretty good. I can even go on weekend backpacking trips, not shower for the entire weekend, and come home smelling decent (or at least not too bad). In early September, I was reading an article that told me of the ill effects of Antiperspirant/Deodorant and the harmful chemicals that are in them. For instance, Aluminum chlorohydrate, aluminum zirconium, tetracholorhydrex gly, or any aluminum compounds are absorbed through the skin, accumulates in the body, and it has been suggested that there is an association between aluminum and Alzheimer’s disease. Parabens are known to cause reproductive harm. Talc is classified as a carcinogen. Propylene glycol absorbs quickly through the skin and is a neurotoxin that may also cause kidney or liver damage. I could go on and on. These are all common ingredients in your normal over-the-counter antiperspirant/deodorant. Besides causing potential Alzheimer's, reproductive harm, and kidney or liver damage, there are chemicals that are said to cause breast cancer in women. Also, blocking your sweat glans is a healthy no-no since our bodies release most of our toxins through our armpit sweat glans. That's why we have BO, from the toxins being released. Apparently, toxins don't smell very good. Anyway...long pre-story short...my wife and I decided to give the natural deodorant market a try.

We started our natural deodorant adventure in early September. Right off the bat, we tried the most common and seemingly popular brand, Tom's of Maine. Upon the first application, we noticed that it was wet going on and a little sticky. It was strange at first, but we got used to it. They have unscented, and lots of decent scents. I was a little disappointed that they didn't have more manly scents. Most were lemon-grass, Honeysuckle Rose, and Calendula. I was looking for Sport Talc or something a little more manly. The best that Tom's of Maine could offer a man was WoodSpice, which kind of smells like a Pine Scented Car Air Freshener. Anyway, after a few days I started to notice that my armpits were red, irritated, and burning. That's not right. Why would that happen? Perhaps I was allergic to the natural ingredients.Also, I noticed that I didn't really smell too bad during the day, but getting ready for bed at night, I would notice a slight unpleasant odor. Not horrible, just not fresh. I like to smell good, so this wasn't going very well for me.

I tried another brand called Jason Natural Deodorant Stick with Tea Tree Oil. It didn't smell too bad and went on dryer than the Tom's of Maine did. But, ouch! More burning, irritated arm pits. Not good! And just for good scientific methodology, I wore no deodorant between trying new brands so that my armpits could heal. It helped that it was a very cold October through December in Colorado.

I tried the Tom's of Maine brand for "sensitive skin", thinking that it would help with the irritation. It did help. This one hurt me less than the others. But, now I was starting to notice that I was smelling a bit more than usual. Also, I was sweating more than usual. This didn't surprise me since I was finally NOT blocking my sweat glans and I was bound to sweat more. The odor issue I chocked up to the sensitive skin brand not having chemicals as potent as the other ones. Back to the drawing board.

I tried another brand called Herbal Clear. This one had a "Sport" scent, so my manly wishes had finally come true. It worked okay for a few days. In fact, I even wore it while I played a hard game of basketball and surprisingly, I didn't stink afterward. I was thinking that I had finally found my brand. Also, it was a lot cheaper than the other brands which ran around $5.99 each. Herbal Clear was a more wallet friendly $3.29. However, after a few days, BAM....red, irritated arm pits. It started to burn. It hurt so much that I remember not being able to put my arms down by my sides due to the pain and irritation. I was beginning to think this natural thing wasn't worth my time, pain, and effort. But, I was determined to find something that would work for me. I did hours of online investigation. I learned about homemade remedies and other options. I decided to try one of these homemade remedies.

I tried a simple recipe that made sense to me that I found online. It said to use sodium bicarbonate. Or for you non-scientific readers, baking soda. Baking Soda is a natural odor eliminator. That's why we put it in our refrigerators. It blocks odor causing bacteria from growing and also absorbs odors. This recipe said to use straight sodium bicarbonate with a few drops of water and make a paste. Then to rub the paste onto your armpits. After waiting a few days for my latest bout of irritation to heal, I gave it a try. I thought my previous bouts with burning and irritation were bad. This one took the cake. It was like putting pure acid on my armpits. Upon further investigation online, I found another recipe that said not to use it straight because it is too strong by itself. Oh...now you tell me! You are supposed to mix it with cornstarch body powder (remember talc body powder is bad for you...causes cancer). So, I tried a 50/50 combo of cornstarch and baking soda. It was like I was making a cake in my armpits. All I needed was sugar, flour, and eggs and I could stick a candle under my arms and celebrate my birthday. This one was yucky. Adding the water made this mud-like paste. It just wasn't going to fly. Upon further investigation online, someone else said to use it dry. Mix the cornstarch powder and baking soda (in a 50/50 ratio) into your favorite powder container and apply it dry after your morning shower. I tried this and for once, no irritation. It was nice. But, it didn't do much for the slight unpleasant odor after a long day. I don't want to be that guy at work who everyone avoids because I stink. Back to the drawing board.

I decided to try a crystal deodorant. This is basically a rock in a plastic deodorant container. It contains natural, hypoallergenic, paraben free and aluminum free mineral salts which block odor causing bacteria. You wet it down under the sink tap, and rub it on your armpits. The thought of rubbing a rock on my armpits sounded less than pleasant, but darn it all, I was going to try all the natural options. To the contrary, wetting the stone and applying it to your underarms was not unpleasant at all. The crystal was smooth and became silky when wet. So, it wasn't too bad. After a few days use, no irritation. No redness. I breathed a sigh of relief. But, on days where it was warmer (and we're talking the mid-40's), it didn't stop the odor. If it couldn't keep me fresh in the cool days of December, what was going to become of me in the 80 degree summers we have here? It's just not going to work. And with that failed attempt, I completely gave up hope and abandoned my search for an effective, non-irritating, odor inhibiting, natural deodorant.

A couple of days before Christmas, I took my old deodorants out of the pantry. I might get Alzheimer's, liver damage, cancer, and have blocked toxins swimming in my bloodstream. But, I won't smell. I won't have red, irritated armpits. For the record, my wife had the same issues and reached the same conclusion. She's back to her old "unnatural" brand.

What surprised me is how my body reacted to the "natural" ingredients I was putting on my skin. If it's natural, should it do that to me? Well, I guess even Poison Ivy is "natural"...but you wouldn't want to put it under your arms. Snake venom is "natural" but you wouldn't want to rub it all over your skin. Stinging Nettles are natural, but you wouldn't wash you hair with them. So, I've been using my old unnatural deodorants for about a week now. Wouldn't you know it? No irritation. No redness. No odor. I'm back to my unnatural self, but at least I smell good and I can keep my arms at my sides again.