The Cologne Pandemic

There is a cologne pandemic spreading in the United States. I can smell it. There are times when I walk around the University where I work and there are men who are drenched in so much cologne, it makes my eyes water or stings when I take a breath. It's ridiculous. If I can smell these men at distances of 15-20 feet and it still repulses me, there is something wrong. I think we need to have a basic grooming class as a required course in high school. Who told these kids that they can bathe in cologne and that it's appealing to the opposite sex? Someone needs to set them straight. I could be wrong, but I am guessing that the females who know these men are just as repulsed by their overwhelming fragrance as I am. But, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe woman actually like a green cloud of stink following around their man. If I'm wrong, please let me know.

I like wearing cologne as much as the next guy. I'll do a couple sprays of Obsession or Escape in the morning. I like to smell good. However, I understand that if you can smell me 15 feet away, there is a problem. Usually, I like to put just enough cologne on so that you have to stand next to me or hug me to smell it. I think that's enough. I like to smell good, not kill birds in mid-air with my cologne stench.

I have noticed some trends, though. The men who tend to practice cologne bathing are usually a specific nationality. I won't mention it here so that I can remain racially sensitive. But, I have noticed that 90% of the men who wear this much cologne are usually from a specific nationality. I wonder if it's a cultural thing. Either way, it needs to be stopped. It's just plain wrong. In much the same way many states have outlawed smoking in public places because people didn't want to walk by and breathe in the cigarette stink, there should be a law against excessive use of cologne. It stinks. Literally.